68% of Swazi's polled believe it is justified to kill your lover if they have cheated on you with someone else ... and a few other thoughts from me.

Life in Swaziland is complicated, yet in the same breath I can say that life in Swaziland is simple.  There doesn’t seem to be any small talk or conversations about the weather or who won the game last night.  Everything discussed is important, and it is usually directly linked to life or death. 

This week I learned that my mother, who has been a follower of Jesus her whole life, now believes that Jesus has forsaken her and left her to die alone.  She has cut off all prayer and communication with Him because he has abandoned her.  She wants a gun so she can end her life, but refuses to acknowledge that she has suicidal thoughts.  Lord, please help me understand why you are allowing this to happen. 

The same day I heard about my mom I got a call from Helen who had taken little baby Jeremiah to the Baylor Pediatric AIDS clinic.  Sadly, he tested positive for HIV.  Jeremiah was found at a bus stop in Mbabane when he was only one week old and is now a month old and has been growing and thriving … and now we know he is infected.  It’s like getting a kick in the stomach, but I will still give thanks that El Roi saw Jeremiah and send him to us for love and care.

Life is complicated, and yet simple. Whether praying for my mom or for all the babies at the El Roi baby home, I am reminded that my focus is to be on HIM and Him alone.  I can’t do any more for my mom than I am doing and I can’t do any more for Jeremiah.  I have to do what I can do and leave the rest in HIS capable hands.  His ways are not our ways and His plans are not our plans – and I try to remind myself of this every single day, or else I will go mad trying to fix things that aren't mine to fix. 

Those are some of my thoughts for this week in Swaziland, but keep reading because I want to share some interesting (and terrifying) statistics from a poll take by a Swazi newspaper.  I saw originally in a blog post by Benjamin Verhulst, who is also living in Swaziland.  These will give you a little different perspective of how Swazi’s think and what we are dealing with around us.  

Living in Swaziland is complicated ... and not.

Janine

People starving, babies getting needles and summer interns serving

It has been a great week with our 2012 summer interns.  They are smart, hard working, funny and willing to do anything.  They visited a dozen families in the Project Canaan community to find out what the real needs are in the community homesteads. They collected garbage and recycling from all the buildings on the farm (THANK YOU REECE!!!). They worked at the Baby Home and Farm Managers Building. They gave away new TOMS Shoes up at El Shaddai and best of all, they brought us all joy and made us laugh. 

The community visits to our new “neighbors” were tough.  Every homestead that we visited seemed empty.  Death has wiped out the very life and vibrancy that once filled those homes and the hearts of the people who have been left behind.  Visit after visit we found one person, often an old grandmother, left caring for the children as the only income earner had gone off to work at Project Canaan.  That income earner was trying to provide for six to twelve dependents, which was clearly an impossible task.  Traditionally, Swazi families farm the land around them and provide much/most of the family food from their own farm and garden.  The family used to be subsidized by income earned outside the home, which was used for school fees and other family needs.  With the drought of recent years very few families are able to grow any food and their cupboards (or plastic buckets on the mud floor where they would store their harvest) are literally bare.  There is no food. Several women told us (with embarrassment and a sense of shame) that the only food their children ate was at school from Monday to Friday.  There is nothing in the morning to give them for breakfast before they leave and nothing when they get home at night.  Weekends are a difficult time for the family as they sit around a fire with nothing to cook. The people around us at Project Canaan are starving AND yet they are some of the “lucky ones” because they are employed.  A single income from farm work is far from what these families need to survive.

The unemployment rate in the Kingdom of Swaziland is estimated to be upwards of 70%.  ONE of the many challenges we saw with our neighbors is that there are so few adults left and so many children that it is really impossible to provide for all the hungry mouths, even if every available adult was able to find employment.  One family we visited only had four people living there, but in housing that once accommodated 30+ people.  The woman’s husband had died.  One of the sons told us that his mother had lost a lot of weight (a typical sign of HIV/AIDS), but we were assured it was because she had a common cold.  The homestead was void of people, void of food and we saw very little hope for the future.  But they were very happy that we had visited. 

Next week we will visit these twelve homes again, this time with our volunteer teams bringing warm clothes (it is very cold here as it is winter in the southern hemisphere), new TOMS Shoes for the children and warm beanie hats for all to wear.  But we can’t go without food.  The would be like Marie Antoinette saying, “let them eat cake” when she was told that there was no bread for the people to eat.  We will take life-giving, high protein “Manna Packs” from the wonderful people at Feed My Starving Children so that the children can get a healthy meal, a full belly and the knowledge that someone really does care about them.

I won’t lie to you though.  The problem is overwhelming and can’t be solved quickly. This is an investment over time, and one that we need to stick with.  But we can never underestimate the value of a visit.

Matthew 25 says that we are to visit those who are in prison because when we do it for “the least of these” we do it for Him.  I believe that “prison” doesn’t always have bars on the windows and locks on the doors.  The women we visited this past week are in prison because they have no choices and no options for a better today or tomorrow.  When we visit them, we bring hope, love and encouragement.

On a happier note, the eight little babies who are living at the El Roi baby home all went to the clinic today for their inoculations.  Each is at a different stage so each one had a different combination, but with eight women to happily hold them they got through the ordeal in less than 2. 5 hours and they slept all the way home in the van.

Another week has finished at Project Canaan and tomorrow Lori Marschall leaves us for California, Ian and Jimmy will drive to Johannesburg to pick up the June team of volunteers coming to serve, and my #1 son heads back to the US to have some time off before he starts at Florida State University in August.  I think Sunday might be a very hard day for me so please keep me in your prayers.  I know Spencer will be just fine, but I will miss him desperately when he is away.  I am not sure where the last 18 years has gone – they flew by and now Spencer gets to stretches his wings, a long long way from home (and his mama).  Gulp.  I am sending my love and prayers with him as he goes.

It’s Saturday morning in Swaziland and I am pensive.

Janine

16-years-old, HIV positive, and pregnant with her third child

On Thursday we got a call from the Social Welfare department saying that there was an 8-month-old baby boy who was in desperate need of help.  On Friday morning Helen and I dropped Chloe off at her school bus at 6:45AM and then headed to Siteki  to see what we could do.

We met with the Social Welfare officer who introduced us to the baby, and his mother.

The baby’s mother is 16-years-old, HIV positive, and pregnant with her third child.  The first child is being raised by the father’s family.  The father of the second child (the one in her arms in front of us) ran off and abandoned them both.  The father of the baby in her belly is dead.  She had so much pain, so much sorrow and a face that was totally without hope.

She was living with her step-sister because all of her family is gone she had no where else to go, but the step-sister’s boyfriend didn’t want to have to provide for the little baby and the new one on way so he kicked out of the house.  She had no where to live, and no way to care for her child(ren).  She went to the Social Welfare office to see if someone could care for her baby, while hoping to be able to abort her unborn child. 

We agreed to take the baby to El Roi and she seemed satisfied.  We also agreed to receive the newborn in August if she promised not to harm the baby.  She agreed.

As the official paper work was completed we discovered that the baby we were taking with us turns one-year-old on Sunday, June 17^th.  He is the size of a 4-month-old and is severely malnourished.  His hair is sparse and a light orangy color. He has a distended belly and his “poop” is the color of sand since there are no nutrients in his body.   Despite his condition he has seven teeth (our first baby with teeth!!) and he smiled at us in the office.

Papers were signed and as we headed to the car.  I asked the Social Welfare officer how this young mother would be feeling at this moment?  Scared?  Desperate?  Mourning?  She told me that the girl was happy that her baby would be cared for and sure enough, the girl smiled and laughed as she handed her baby to Helen.  I am not sure how to interpret this.  Happy that the baby will be well cared for or happy that she no longer carries that burden … or both?

We drove straight to the Baylor Pediatric AIDS clinic and had him tested and weighed.  He is HIV negative (THANK YOU JESUS!) and he weighs 12 pounds, 12 ounces (and remember, he is one year old).  We have a long way to go with this little one to get him healthy and happy, but that time begins today and we are thankful for the opportunity to serve him.

 

We asked what his siSwati name meant in English and we were told that it means “God with us”, so this little one will be called Emmanuel, God with us.

It has been another challenging week, but I am thankful for all that we have been given.  Our summer interns arrived yesterday and today they started sorting thousands of pairs of TOMS Shoes, preparing them for distribution to the children who live in our rural church communities.  Tomorrow we hang curtains, harvest our Moringa crop and build a dog pen for our newest addition to the Maxwell family (her name is Nala).  It’s Saturday morning in Swaziland and we are all alive and well.

Thanks for following, reading and praying. 

Janine

Ditched baby update and some "first world problems".

We have just finished our first full week living in Swaziland.  It was a lot harder than “planned”.  I am a great planner, and you would think that since I have spent 150+ weeks in Africa over the past nine years that I would know that things never work out here the way I plan them, but alas, I had higher expectations, and my own expectations created a bumping landing here in Swaziland.

First, the good news; if you read my May 23^rd blog you will remember the story of the young girl who gave birth to a baby and dropped it in the ditch only to be caught by police and put in jail for abandoning her child.  Well, it didn’t quite happen like that, in fact after the young mother abandoned the baby she ran away so that the police wouldn’t catch her and put her in jail.  The family promised the hospital to come for the baby, but they never did.  I dropped in to the hospital on my first day here to check on a different baby (a newborn who had been found in a bag up in a tree) and instead I found the little one whom we thought had been taken home by the family, as promised.  After a good conversation with a very helpful doctor and a wonderful Social Work Department we were able to bring the 4-month-old baby back to El Roi while the police continue to search for the mother and/or settle whether the family does want to keep the child or not. 

Spencer was with me when we drove in to pick up the baby boy (who we will call “David” for now since he is not in our permanent care yet).  The Social Worker took us to her office and we passed by two tiny little bundles sitting on the chair outside her office.  It was a set of twins, maybe a day old.  I asked the Social Worker what their story was and she told us that the babies’ mother had been raped by her own father.  The twins were a result of the rape.  The man had been charged and was given 27 years in prison, which is excellent and very uncommon here in Swaziland.  Incest is considered private and rarely goes to public court and is almost never settled in public court, so this is good news.  The Grandmother of the babies (who could be the mother of the girl or could be another wife of the man) has offered to raise the babies.  I am not convinced that this will work out, but we will keep tabs on it.  Sorry that was all so confusing.

As Ian, Spencer, David and I headed back to El Roi I received a call from Helen Mulli who said we had just received ANOTHER baby from a different hospital.  The hospital Social Worker and people from the Social Welfare Department stopped in unannounced with a little 3-week-old child.  His name is Jeremiah and he was found abandoned at a bus stop in Mbabane at the age of one week.  He had been in hospital for two weeks and now El Roi is his home. We now have seven babies under the age of one year, and they are all doing very well.  By all accounts this was a great start to my first week living in Swaziland.

So why is it then that I let the rest of the week fall apart?  The container we shipped two months ago had landed here weeks ago with our furniture, clothing, food, beds, towels, sheets and every other earthly thing we could have shipped, but was stuck in red tape at customs.  Our house, which we are building on Project Canaan and which was to be completed in April, is not finished.  After talking, pleading, crying (and some gnashing of teeth) we finally moved in on Thursday, only to find toilets overflowing (or not working), no hot water in some rooms, doors with no keys, workers all over the place looking in windows with no curtains, and worst of all, there is not a single electrical plug (or mirror for that matter) in ANY of our bathrooms.  We have since learned that it is against fire code to put them in bathrooms in Swaziland.  Sigh.   I thought I was going to have a stroke.  We couldn’t get people to understand the urgency of getting settled so that we could get on to the work we were here to do OR to get Chloe in her new school (having showered and with clean clothes!).

Side note:  For those of you in the mission field I know you are cracking up at this, but for those of you in your comfy homes, a little empathy is much appreciated.  J

It was at some point on Thursday, when Lori Marschall and Jana Franz arrived to help get The Lodge ready for our Summer Interns, that I realized I was really tired of hearing myself complain.  I was also disappointed in myself that I couldn’t be more “go with the flow” now that I live in Africa and even more disturbed that all these comforts were so very important to me.  It seemed that I am happy to serve Jesus, but not until all my boxes are unpacked, the toilet works and the shower has hot water.  Oh, I also would like my fridge to work, the electric fencing to be installed to keep us safe, maybe a washing machine to wash our clothes, and really, would an electrical socket and a mirror be too much to ask for in my bathroom?  If I had all those things sorted I could really really serve the Lord and the people of Swaziland better.  Sigh.

The scripture tells us that we are to give thanks in all things.  I wasn’t giving thanks for the beautiful home that we were building.  I wasn’t giving thanks for the people who were trying to help, and I had quickly forgotten the blessing of having two new little babies.  Yes, I am human.  Yes, I like nice things and comfort.  And yes, I am learning.   I seem to be a slow learner, but He is a patient teacher and for that I am thankful.

It is Saturday morning in Swaziland and I am alive. Today is a new day and I look forward to enjoying the view of the mountains, spending time with my family and listening for His small voice in the wind.

Thanks for reading. 

Janine

Today we move to Africa, for real.

The 365-day countdown has come to an end.  Today is the day we get on a plane and move to Swaziland, Africa.  This year has flown by, but this past week seemed like it took another year.  Transition is hard and I can't say that I have handled it well…there were many tears, too many times snapping at my family, and then more tears.  But today is the day I have longed for since 2003.  It is time to move and serve the Lord whom I love on a continent that I love.

I wondered what to do about the Maxwell's Moving to Africa blog and, while the URL will stay the same, I think I will change the name of it to "Live from Swaziland ... it's Saturday morning" (said in my best "Live from New York... it's Saturday Night" voice).  I will try to blog every second Saturday if I can.  At this point we don’t anticipate having regular internet service, but hopefully it will improve with time.  I am an eternal optimist.

We have been building a house on Project Canaan that won’t be quite ready for us when we arrive, so we will live in the long-term volunteer housing until it is finished.  All our furniture and "stuff" is stuck at the border and they won't release it until we arrive, so it looks like we won't have the soft landing that I had hoped for, but at least it is there.  The water filtration system is in the container as well, so we won’t have drinkable water until the container is released and the filtration system is installed.  The electric fencing is still being installed, and we are not sure about whether we have electricity yet (which is obviously required for the ELECTRIC fencing to work).

Chloe will start school on June 6th - parachuting into the middle of 10th grade (they call it Form 4 there).  The school year runs January to December so she will have some work to do to catch up. She scored really well on the admission testing and she is a straight A student, so we are confident that she will do just fine.

Spencer is coming with us on May 31st and will stay for three weeks to help get us settled.  I am so thankful for that.  We will come back in August to get him settled at Florida State University (and shed another bucket of tears I am sure).

Last week my mom was sent to a hospital in Guelph from the nursing home where she was living. She will be moved to a mental hospital next week where they will try to find a way to stabilize her mentally so that she can return to the nursing home and have them provide proper care (which she has been refusing).

I am hit with waves of emotion that seem to be uncontrollable and at times unbearable.  I long for this time of transition to be over.  While we have worked in Swaziland since 2005 (Spencer calculated that he has been in Africa for 70+ WEEKS since he was ten years old), I am sure there will be things that we are not prepared for. That is okay. We will be home, finally, and for that I am grateful. 

We fly out of Atlanta today, May 31^st, and will arrive in Johannesburg on June 1^st, where we will be met at the airport by Kaleli Mulli, and my second best friend (next to Ian of course), Ralph Glass, from Canada.  We will drive to Swaziland on Saturday, June 2^nd and I will try to give you a report somewhere along the way.

So with that I say thank you to all of you who have followed us on all or part of this 365-day journey.  Thanks for your prayers, your encouragement and your friendship.  You will never know how much you all mean to me.  Thank you Jesus for choosing our family to go and serve and thank you for giving each of us the courage to say “yes”.

Janine

---

My birth mother was 15 years old when I was born.

In 1963 a 14-year-old girl made a poor choice and had sex with her 16 year-old boyfriend.  She was afraid, embarrassed and the family was ashamed.  She was immediately sent 400 miles away to a home for unwed mothers where she had excellent pre-natal care, attended school and then gave birth at the age of 15 years.  The baby was put up for adoption, but kept a secret from the rest of the girl’s family and from the community so that the girl and the family could save face.  To this day, the family and the community do not know about that little baby.  That baby was me.

Last Friday we got a call from the Social Welfare department in Swaziland saying that they had found a baby in a ditch and asked if the baby could be accepted at the El Roi Home for abandoned babies.  They said the baby was 3-5 weeks old and needed immediate care.  Of course we said yes.  The baby was taken to the hospital for the weekend to be cared for while an investigation took place and paper work was completed.  On Monday we learned that the police had found the mother.  She was in the 8^th grade (likely 13-14 years old) and knowing what is happening in Swaziland I can assume that she didn’t make the choice to have sex, but was more likely forced to have sex (note – I don’t know the facts of this yet, but believe it is a solid assumption).  

It is illegal to “dump” a baby in Swaziland and so the young girl/mother was arrested and put in jail.  We are told that her parents (also uncertain of this fact) wanted to keep the baby and so the baby was taken to them.

Since I heard this I have been frustrated, sad, concerned and anxious for the next eight days to pass so that we can get on a plane and go to Swaziland.  Yesterday my dear friend Sandra asked me what I would do if I were there now?  My first answer was “advocate”.  This is not just about the abandoned baby, but it is about this young girl and her future.  I will be there soon and hope to get more information about this particular situation.  How did she become pregnant so young?  What state of fear and hopelessness would bring her to a place where she believed that dumping her baby in a ditch was her best or only choice?  How long will she be in jail?  Will she be allowed to move back home?  Is the baby really safe where it is now?  What does the future hold for this next generation? 

When my mother was 15 years old, and pregnant, there was a system in Canada that provided a solution so that I wasn’t aborted or dropped in a ditch and my mother wasn’t put in jail.  I am alive today and my life has a purpose.  But here is the interesting part to me as a follower of Jesus.  Whether we make bad choices or bad things are forced upon us, He can still make things beautiful out of any situation.  I don’t want to see young girls getting pregnant out of wedlock or by force, but I can’t help but be thankful for my mother getting pregnant because I am here today.  Maybe God allowed that to happen SO THAT I would be here today, ready to go and advocate for this young girl and her baby.  I wonder what her baby will grow up to be and what he/she will do?

Psalm 139:13-18 says,

For you created my inmost being;

you knit me together in my mother’s womb.
I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; 

your works are wonderful, I know that full well.

My frame was not hidden from you
when I was made in the secret place,
when I was woven together in the depths of the earth.
Your eyes saw my unformed body;
all the days ordained for me were written in your book

before one of them came to be.
How precious to me are your thoughts, God!
How vast is the sum of them!
Were I to count them,
they would outnumber the grains of sand —
when I awake, I am still with you.

We get on a plane in eight days and while there are many moving (and complicated) parts in our lives right now, I am thankful that His plans are not our plans and that His plans are perfect. I am thankful that I have been chosen to care for orphans, vulnerable and abandoned children.  I could have been one of them, but instead HE rescued and redeemed me.  Whew!  “Thankful” doesn’t come close to expressing my feelings today.

Janine

PS – I have a secret relationship with my birth mother now.  Her husband and children do not know that I exist, but she will read this blog because she follows my life from the shadows.   So I would like to take this public, yet secret, opportunity to say THANK YOU for not aborting me, and for giving me the right to life, even though it came at a great cost to you.  I love you.

What if I had said "NO"?

In 16 days our family will be getting on a plane to Africa.  My head moves quickly from having no thoughts to write down to having too many thoughts to write down. Maybe that is an aging thing?  A woman thing?  A mama thing? Or maybe just the reality that we are moving to Africa in 16 days?

Five and a half years ago we moved to Alpharetta, Georgia.  To explain it in "Christian-ese"  I thought I had "given it all up for Him", but down deep I really did love my house, my yard, my neighborhood and my life in Canada.  If I was going to move ANYWHERE I thought it would be to Africa.  Didn't God know that I wanted to move to Africa?  Wasn't I really clear with Him on that in my prayers and daily conversations?  Had He forgotten the children living on the streets that HE introduced me to?  Had He forgotten those that I longed to care for, encourage and love?  Instead, He moved us to a wealthy, (largely white) suburb of Atlanta - this from Toronto, the largest multi-cultural city in the world.  I was not pleased.  We moved into a beautiful house in a beautiful neighborhood, and I was miserable.  I was angry.  Why America (no offense meant to all my American friends), but why not Africa? 

As I look back on the past  5-1/2 years I am in awe of the people whom we have met, the places we have gone and the miracles that we have seen.  If we hadn't moved here, and moved straight to Africa (my plan) we would have missed so much.  I am thankful for North Point Community Church and for Chloe's small group and small group leader (shout out to Alyse!) who have come alongside Chloe to encourage her to be the most amazing young woman she has become.  I am thankful for the theater department at Milton High School where Spencer has been able to thrive, grow, create and learn.  After watching the incredible Cirque Kuwa performance (over and over again) I thought to myself, "what if I had said NO to moving here - Spencer would have missed this opportunity."  You see, our plans, our desires and our obedience have direct implications for everyone around us - especially our immediate family.

If we had not moved I would never have met the amazing Birk family and seen God's glory pour through a family's worst nightmare.  And of course, without that nightmare, we would not have the El Roi Baby home today.  Without the loss of little Jared Birk, our five little babies (Joshua, Esther, Caleb, Levi and Anna) might not be alive today.  Oh, what I would have missed.

So I repent again and give thanks, again, for His plans are not our plans, but they are BETTER than our plans, every time.

I continue to find it interesting how others perceive our move to Swaziland.  We are not moving there to be missionaries just like we didn't move to Georgia to be missionaries.  We are just a family moving to serve in another country at this time.  But this time I feel like I won the lottery.  I get to go and spend time in a beautiful country, serve with people I love and respect and serve people who are in desperate need.  "Religion that God our Father considers pure and faultless is this; to look after the orphan and widow in distress and keep oneself from being polluted by the world."  James 1:27

For the past 5-1/2 years I could look after orphans and widows from Georgia, but it was a daily struggle to keep myself from being polluted by the mall, Starbucks, Macy's one day sales and NCIS marathons on TV.  You know what I mean?

I look forward to long walks around the farm, driving Chloe to her really cool International school, sipping coffee with Ian looking out at our amazing view of the fields, Skyping with Spencer to hear about his life at FSU, having philosophical conversations with Kaleli, rocking babies to sleep with Helen and visiting orphans and widows in distress with Pastor Mike.  I have won the lottery, no doubt in my mind, and I am so VERY thankful that I didn't blow it by saying, "no, I don't want to move to Georgia." 

Is there something that you are doing because you want to, not because you believe God has asked you to?  Are you avoiding doing something that you know you are supposed to do?  A phone call perhaps?  A move?  A job change?  Don't put it aside for another day.  Don't blow it.  His plans are better than our plans, I promise.

Thankful in Georgia.

Janine