Aborted baby is alive

Not much surprises me anymore, but this week I heard a story this week that took my breath away, and I want to share it with you so that you can see the heart of this ministry and why we are here.

There was a young teenage girl who was living in a typical Swazi homestead with her mother, her Grandmother and her Step Grandfather.  Recently the mother of the girl noticed that the teenager was pregnant and the mother was very angry and ashamed. She immediately took the girl to have an abortion (which is illegal here) and the girl was given pills to abort the fetus.  Hours later the baby arrived, and was alive.  The woman who gave them the pills told them to not worry about it, just leave the baby alone and she will die.  So they did.

We don’t know where in the homestead that they lay the 6-pound baby (obviously close to full term) for five days, but we do know that she lay there, waiting to die, until neighbors started asking questions.  The questions led the family to take the newborn to a nearby clinic to be checked out, and they began providing minimal care.  The story is a bit cloudy from here, but two weeks after the baby was born the police raided the homestead after the case was reported to them, finding the baby, the mother and the alleged father … the Step-Grandfather! 

El Roi, the God who sees, saw this little baby and He has a plan for her life.

I was looking at some statistics that we are preparing at the request of the Deputy Prime Minister.  With the VERY limited information that we have on the 228 children who have been placed with us through the Social Welfare Department, we know that 17 of them are a direct product of rape. We know that 32 of them came from young teenagers and we know that 32 babies came from women who were severely mentally and/or physically disabled.  It is not a stretch to assume that most of the young teenage pregnancies were due to a payment of food/clothing/school fees (which means they did it because they were in need,  which constitutes rape) and it’s not a stretch to assume that the 32 mentally disabled women did not knowingly consent to having sex.  We have NO idea of the history of the babies who came to us from pit latrines, found on the side of the road or found hanging in a plastic bag in a tree, so they are not included in these numbers.

The government passed our first ever Sexual Offence and Domestic Violence Act in August 2018 (SODV) and I am told that many men in the nation our outraged and believe that the country will be destroyed by this new law that makes rape a crime. 

The front of yesterday’s newspaper is not shocking to anyone living in eSwatini because it is so common.  It is called Tibi Tendlu and it is “sweeping under the mat” the knowledge that incest is happening in the homestead.  We hear about it every, single, day.  This father was raping his own two daughters, but this time it was reported and he was tried and found guilty and given 32 years in prison.  

While men will continue to abuse girls/women, and most won’t get caught or prosecuted, I am thankful that we do have a law that brings us closer to protecting the women of this country, and imprisoning those who are found guilty. And I am also thankful for the knowledge that El Roi, the God who sees, is the final Judge and He also sees those men, and they will stand before the throne of God one day and answer for their actions.

For now, our role is to provide a safe haven for babies who are in need and to raise them with a hope for their future. Will you please sponsor one of our children today so that we can continue to say “yes” when we are called and asked to help a baby in need?  Thank you for joining our growing family.

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Live from eSwatini … trusting in the God who sees.

Janine

Her mother just didn't love her.

This week I heard one of the saddest stories I have ever heard. 

I was sitting with a young teenage girl who was impregnated through a violent rape. She is angry, hurt and cries uncontrollably, a lot.  I sat with her and asked her to tell me about her mother and father, and she got very angry.  But then she spoke.

When she was in 7-years-old her father was very sick (Tuberculosis she was told) and her mother moved away with all the other children, but left her alone to care for him, saying that she wasn’t the girl’s mother.  It took five long, painful years before the father finally succumbed to his disease(s) and died.  The young girl was left alone, but not for long.  When her mother learned that her father was dead she moved back home with the other children and kicked her out.  That was in 2012.  She was only 12-years old, but was sent away to live with a half-sister who was 21-years old and living with a man and their three children.

After she reported the rape the police went searching for her mother and found her. When they told her about the rape, she laughed.  They asked her to help her pregnant daughter, who was clearly distraught, but she refused. Not only that, the mother then went home and ran around the community, laughing about the rape and pregnancy. She even went to far as to go to the rural school to report that the girl would not be going back to school, because she was pregnant.  The girl tried to commit suicide and kill the unborn child.  That is when I was called by the police for help.

One thing that I have not been able to get used to here is how people laugh when they hear about someone else’s pain.  It’s very common and I find it disconcerting, and cruel.  Maybe it’s nervous laughter?  Maybe its what they have been taught?  But it’s hard to hear someone laugh when they hear about rape or child abuse.

I did not laugh when this teenager told me the same story that I had already heard from the police officer.  I wept with her, and told her how very sorry I was.  I told her I was sorry that her mother is cruel and inhumane. I told her I was sorry that she had to care for a very sick father and watch him die. I am sorry that she is pregnant. 

I also told her that my birth mother was 15-years-old when she got pregnant with me, and that God clearly had a plan. I reassured her that God has a plan for her life, and a plan for her unborn baby’s life.  She did not seem at all reassured, and remains very angry and hurt, but she has been told. And I will tell her again and again.  Please pray with me for her joy to be restored and her heart to be healed, by the only Father who will never leave her nor forsake her. 

Live from Swaziland … praying for all of the women in Swaziland.

Janine

PS - On a happier note, today we were able to deliver food to all of people who were retrenched when we closed our farming operation due to lack of water.  BIG shout out to Judy Wilferth and our friends at La Croix Church in Cape Girardeau, MO for hearing the cries of the people and providing 2-months worth of food for each and every person.  One lady said that last night her family ate the last bite of food that they had, and she didn't know what she was going to do.  She cried out to God for help, and today He answered her prayer.  Amen.

When you find out it happened to one of your own

I didn’t expect it. 

I know that children of all ages are raped in Swaziland (and many other countries) every day, and in fact fact, I would suggest that it is an epidemic here.  I also know that there is a myth in many sub-Saharan African countries that if you have sex with a virgin, you will be cured of HIV/AIDS.  It is well documented that dozens (if not more) babies are raped every day in South Africa with the hopes of the man being cured of HIV/AIDS. 

But, because so many of our children come to us as newborns (50%) and because our general policy is to only accept children under the age of 12-months, I didn’t expect to have a child who had been sexually assaulted.  I guess one never “expects” such things.

On Wednesday morning I was handed a Doctors report about one of our little girls.  This child was one of our “exception to the rules” and she came to us just after her 2^nd birthday.  She had multiple fractures in her arms and two serious breaks in her leg. But it wasn’t until we received the final Doctors report this week that we learned the rest of her truth. She has been sexually assaulted and the scaring is what told the story.  May I repeat that she is only 2-years-old.

Of course I will not be posting a name or a photo of this child.  She will remain faceless to you, but she will no longer remain voiceless.  I contacted the Social Welfare Officer to report the new information and have committed whatever resources are needed to find out who the evil perpetrator is and have them put in prison.  Quickly.

She is our daughter now, ALL of ours, and we will seek and find justice for her.

Meanwhile, we pray that her heart, her body and her mind will heal in this place of safety and that she will quickly come to know her heavenly Father who loves her unconditionally and who will never hurt her. 

Please pray for all the other voiceless children around the world who are suffering today. May El Roi, the God who sees, comfort them in their times of need.

Live from Swaziland … let us cry together on this one.

Janine

PS – We believe it is her biological Grandfather who is the abuser.

People bathing in donkey blood, 80,000 witches in Swaziland, and a national food shortage

Reading the newspaper in Swaziland is shocking, heart breaking and disheartening MOST of the time.  Rarely is there a story of good news, good people or hope.

It is rare that a day goes by where there is not a news report of a rape.  Rape is so common in Swaziland that the newspapers really only report the most shocking ones, like children being raped, old Grandmothers being raped or a 60-year old Pastor raping his own Granddaughter for years.  Rape is an epidemic in Swaziland, and it is not the only African country where that is a true statement.

This issue of rape and other Gender Based Violence (GBV) has really got me worked up. I have started taking photos every time I see an article in the paper about the topic and have set up meeting with people in high levels of government, the Royal family and other NGO’s dealing with this issue.  I have nothing to report on it yet, but please pray for me as I journey down a path to help girls and women in Swaziland. It’s not okay with me that this is happening.

But not all the news is about rape, we also have a Pastor here who is teaching his congregants to eat grass, live snakes and even drink petrol in order to gain power and strength.  Last week there was a family killing a donkey and covering themselves with the blood of the donkey so that they could be cleansed.  Then there is the “normal” news including a message from the Deputy Prime Ministers office announcing that the country is facing a “Food Shortage Disaster”.

I don’t have a point to this blog really, other than to ask for prayer for our beloved Swaziland.  There is a lot of darkness and evil here, as there is everywhere in the world.  Sin is sin. Darkness is darkness.  But sometimes articles that claims there are 80,000 witches/warlocks in Swaziland (with a population of just under one million people) can put ones hair up on end.

Thank you for loyally reading this blog and for the love and support shown to us each and every week.  This would all be too much with your prayers and commitment to be alongside us.

Live from Swaziland … just keepin’ it real.

Janine

Rape victim doesn't want the baby... what does she do?

How do you get in front of the “baby dumping” curve?  Who does a pregnant mother turn to in a time of great distress BEFORE she decides to dump or kill her baby?

Last Saturday I was invited to attend a march, which was encouraging people to stopping aborting babies or dumping them in the pit latrines or ditches.  We stopped for a time of prayer near some reeds where more than 40 fetuses and birthed babies had been found dead.  It was a chilling moment.

During the event I was chatting with a senior member of the Child Protection Services department of the police and I asked him if there was a way for us to get ahead of the dumping?  Is there anywhere a woman could feel safe to go and share her fear?   He told me about a young woman who had gone to the police because she had been raped and absolutely did not want the baby nor could she care for the baby. Ah ha!  There is one who we might be able to help BEFORE she makes a bad decision out of hopelessness.

Last Thursday I met the her face to face at the police station.  She is 26-years old and a lovely young woman.  She is a single mom with two-year-old twins.  She is now 39+ weeks pregnant and the baby is due on October 4^th.    I will call her Nomsa, but that is not her real name. 

Nomsa rents a tiny room on the outskirts of town where she lives with her boys.  She walks more than an hour to work each evening after dropping the twins off at a neighbor to care for them while she works the nightshift.  Her dishwashing shift starts at 6PM and goes until 7AM.  When she finishes her 13-hour shift she walks back and picks up her sons and takes them to the small room.  During the day she must rest, do laundry, feed them and care for them before leaving again for work. 

One day, 39 weeks ago, Nomsa was walking through the forest to go and visit a friend when a man jumped out of nowhere.  He grabbed her and started beating her trying to force her to the ground. She screamed for help and he stuffed a cloth in her mouth to silence her and beat her more.  When she continued to struggle to get away, he pulled out a knife to silence her, and then he raped her.

Nomsa was distraught, but told no one out of fear and shame.  When she realized she was pregnant she sought help from her church community and they sent her to the police.    She wanted to abort the child, but when she explored that option she found out that it was too late, the child was too far developed. And so she was stuck.  She couldn’t possibly care for another baby.  She was doing her best to care for her twins, but a third child would be impossible.   What could she do?  While Nomsa knew that baby dumping was wrong, maybe that would be her only choice once this child, conceived during a violent rape, arrived.   She had no family who could help and she was very alone.

Our meeting on Thursday was so sad, but in a way I was encouraged by the action and care the police had taken in this situation.  When the police told Nomsa that we could provide a home for her baby if she promised not to dump it or harm it, she was overjoyed!  She was hopeful. She knew disposing of the baby was wrong, but El Roi (the God who sees) heard her cry and saw her pain and sent help to her this week.

So now we are awaiting a phone call.  Nomsa has agreed to go to the hospital to give birth and she believes the baby will be here any day.  I have mixed emotions (again).  We are able to prevent this child from possible death or injury and can help this mother not have to live with guilt and shame, but I wish we could help her in a way that she can care for this little one.  But that is not what we are called to do right now.  Maybe one day we will be able to provide housing and employment that would allow this woman to care for all three of her children, that would be great.  But for now, we do what we can with what we have and we give thanks.

Now for an update on the prison baby. After a week of advocating at the highest levels of several government departments we have been told that the 5-month old baby must stay in prison with the mother, even though the mother is begging us to take the baby so that he will not die of malnutrition.  We have tried everything and everyone and our friends involved in child safety are frustrated, enraged and discouraged.  Today I must go to the prison and tell the mother, face to face, that we are not allowed to help.  Bureaucracy wins and we pray that the baby doesn’t lose because of it.  We will take her the socks and underwear she has asked for as she only has one pair of each, and we will take her a compassionate smile, a word of encouragement and a scripture of hope stuffed in her socks.  I don’t look forward to the drive today, but I trust that His plans are better than our plans and that they are in fact perfect.

Finally, an update on the 16-year old mother from a few weeks ago. She is still living  on the street or in a brothel or wherever she can lay her head.  She told us she wants to nurse her baby until he is 6-months old and then give him to us.  We are not sure what her thinking/logic is in this?  Sadly she is HIV positive and refuses treatment so she likely passing on the HIV to her baby through her breast milk.  Again, our plans are not His plans and we continue to pray that El Roi sees that young girl and the baby and that His plan for them is fulfilled.

Live from Swaziland … this journey is filled with ups and downs.

Janine

PS - I took this photo while at the police station last week.  It was a large poster on the wall of the office we were in.  I asked if I could have a copy and they said it was a poster from the year 2000, but it was still a good message so they keep it up.