To live in a new and different culture successfully it helps to work diligently to learn about the customs and practices of the people whose country or region you are living in. This was true when we moved from Ontario, Canada to Georgia, USA. While we might look the same, culturally it was a huge change for us and one that required study and understanding.
Moving to Swaziland is much the same, but different. Just when I think I have heard it all,
I am smacked up the side of the head as a new cultural practice is explained to
me. Last week I had one of those
conversations that made me say, “huh??”
Today I will do my best to share it with you.
Swazi culture is steeped in tradition including many that
include Traditional Healers/Medicine Men or what we might call Witch
Doctors. Last week a friend
of mine was called to the funeral of the woman whom her husband’s brother had
been living with for eight years. Typically funerals here start in the evening
and include an all night Vigil filled with many things I won’t talk about in
this blog. In the wee hours of the
morning the actual funeral takes place and the burial happens as the sun comes
up.
My friend (who shall remain nameless) planned to skip the Night
Vigil and arrive at the funeral at 5AM.
At the last minute she was told that she must arrive at 3AM because
there was to be a wedding first.
The man wanted the woman to be buried in his homestead (part of a
Chiefdom) and because they had never married (either legally or traditionally)
there had to be a wedding between the dead woman and the live man or else she
could not be buried there by traditional Swazi law.
Also as a part of Swazi culture, the younger sister of the
dead woman was to step in to her place as “wife” after the marriage ceremony
took place to the deceased. The
grooms’ family had to meet with the “bride’s” (still the deceased) family and
negotiate the Lobola (the number of cows the family would require for the bride
… who is now dead). Once that
negotiation took place and several cows were brought in as a down payment they
proceeded with the wedding ceremony with the coffin and the groom present.
Meanwhile, the younger sister cries out and laments the woes
of getting married, on behalf of her dead sister (traditional weddings require
the bride to cry out loud because she is being married. My friend further explained that since
the bride was dead “someone had to cry” so the sister did the crying on behalf
of the dead bride).
After the wedding ceremony finishes, the funeral continues
and the wife of the man is buried in the family homestead. After the burial is
finished the sister of the deceased, who is now the wife of the widower, then
stays at the homestead with her new husband. After I asked a million questions that resulted in some
nervous laughter and a million answers the thing I was the most perplexed about
was that Christian Pastors participate in these ceremonies alongside the
Traditional Healers. Why? The answer I was given was because if
the Traditional Marriage didn’t happen then the burial could not continue, so
the Christian Pastor is there for the first ceremony so that he can perform the
second ceremony. I will do some
follow up on this one with some of our local Pastors to get their “take” on
it.
On a side note, my friend was “fined” by the family of the
deceased for not wearing the appropriate Swazi clothing (her Swazi wedding
dress made with goat skin etc) and had to pay the fine of a live goat to those
whom she offended.
The more I learn, the less I know.
The more I learn, the less I know.
In other news … we got three new babies this week. Luke was
born on August 6th and abandoned by his mother in the hospital. Malachi is 18-months old and severely
malnourished. His drunkard mother
would leave him alone all day and night locked in a room by himself. He also
arrived with a present … chicken pox!
So he moved directly in to the infirmary and is enjoying one-on-one time
with one of the few Aunty’s who has had chicken pox. (Sadly, this same Aunty is
the one whose house burned to the ground only a few short days ago).
18-month old Malachi. |
A plaque in memory of Michelle McClure is on the El Rofi Medical Centre. |
2-month old Michelle. |
Janine
PS - if you want to help us feed and clothe these new babies on a monthly basis please sign up to be a Heart for Africa ANGEL today.
In the US: https://heartforafrica.secure.force.com/pmtx/cmpgn__donations?id=701C0000000VFWR
In Canada: http://www.heartforafrica.ca/Project%20Canaan%20Children.aspx
PS - if you want to help us feed and clothe these new babies on a monthly basis please sign up to be a Heart for Africa ANGEL today.
In the US: https://heartforafrica.secure.force.com/pmtx/cmpgn__donations?id=701C0000000VFWR
In Canada: http://www.heartforafrica.ca/Project%20Canaan%20Children.aspx
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